Self Control
Oh self control… What an internal battle I have with self control. We go way back…
What does the bible say about self control? I actually googled that question. The answer is simple- the bible says A LOT about self control. I never realized how important it was to God. Maybe this is why it has always been a struggle in my life. I have never taken my self control issues to God and sought out his teachings on it. Yikes, that was hard to admit…
Self Control v. Controlling
Control is about making sure we get what we want. Self-Control, in contrary, is more about making sure we get what we need. Control is about satisfying our flesh with immediate gratification. Self-Control is valuing greater, eternal good over what feels good now.
Walk by the Spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. The flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh, They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. Galatians 5:16-17
Keeping Our Power
So often when we are in the jungle of life, we give away so much of our power. We react to things that happen to us or said to us. We then give that person or that situation power over our emotions, thoughts, or actions.
For example…
I get up every day at 5am. I use the first couple of hours to get some “me” time; workout, sip my latte, and do my bible study. That is if one of my kids don’t wake up and throw a wrench in MY plans. Too many times I have thrown a pity party when a kid wants morning snuggles or an early breakfast, or whatever. I react- I let my joy leave and give it away. (EMOTIONAL POWER GONE)
I am hungry (and probably tired). Instead of grabbing an apple I eat a sleeve of Oreos or 3 servings of chips. So many times I have given into instant satisfaction instead of a healthy, better option. (HEALTHY ACTION GONE)
Martin gets home from works and makes a comment about something being messy, he says things out loud to help him remember to attend to that later. I take the comment like he is unhappy about how I ran the house while he was at work, I have failed. (THOUGHTS MISGUIDING ME)
These are just three ways I lack self-control in my life. Three of many if I am being honest. But- I want the fruit of self-control in my emotions, thoughts, and actions. How am I going to do it?
How to Strengthen Your Self-Control
1. Study Scripture- Memorize it even! Here are some verses I am focusing on…
For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7
Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control. Proverbs 25:8
No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Hebrews 12:11
Whoever is patient has great understanding, but one who is quick-tempered displays folly. Proverbs 14:29
I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13
2. Stop, Drop, and Pray
When I feel out of (self) control, I want to train my body to stop, drop to my knees (literally or metaphorically), and pray for the Holy Spirit to give me self-control. If you don’t think that would work- go read Philippians 4:13 again.
3. Find an Accountability Partner
If you have a specific area that you are wanting to gain self- control in- TELL someone about it. Ask them to encourage your journey towards self-control by checking in on you. We are not made to do life alone and by the grace of God and the gift of Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit can be with you and with your accountability partner. Everyone has the opportunity to bear the fruits of the Spirit.
4. Seek Help
If you have some big issues that you need professional help in gaining self-control, don’t hesitate, ask for help today. Don’t rely on a google search or my blog post to solve your struggles. You are precious and so valuable to God, go get help so you can live out His will for your life. You are worth it.
Next Steps
Here are a few things you can do this week to help with self-control. I am using physical health as an example.
-Write down a goal you have for your physical body. (ex. I want to get 10,000 steps a day or I want to meal plan)
-Pray about your specific goal. Set an alarm(s) to remind you to say a short prayer throughout your day/week.
-Assign a verse of scripture that matches with your goal. Memorize it. Make your phone background.
– Make an action plan that you can do this week to help get you closer to your goal. Share this action plan with a friend. Ask them to check in with you in a week to get an update.
My prayer for you
Dear Lord, Thank you for your Holy Spirit. Please fill my soul with the fruits of the spirit. Lord, help me build up my self-control in all areas of my health. Remind me every day, every hour, every minute that you are in control of my world. Help me let go of control that I can’t control. Help me grasp the control that I can control- my emotions, my actions, and my thoughts. Thank you, Lord, for not giving up on me even though I fail at self-control daily. Continue to renew my soul. Amen.
Come back again tomorrow for a new Miller Family Snapshot!
